Note from the Editors…
Yes, we are late.
Of course, we don't have a good excuse.
Endayta, we are shamed.
And no, we are not lazy, unmotivated so-and-sos. (At least not every day.
Well, not every single day.)
First we take a two month vacation, then we are late getting this issue out…
next thing you know, we will be charging you to read these pages and … waaaait a
second… wait a darnity darn second… now there's a not so wacky idea.
OK. Fine. Your defiant "Ere baki! Yemanachiu defar mooTiwoCH!"
is coming in loud and deaf-iningly clear. Everybody knows that we don't posses
the requisite wonay to ever ask anyone to pay to read our
chikonet. But we are giving serious consideration to those who
want to pay us not to litter the Information Super-Highway with our brand of
As we turn the massive wheel of the SELEDA Excuse Vault to brandish new and
highly yemayemesil stories to exculpate our tardiness, we
realize, enday! YabeTew yefenda! Why burden our readers with
imponderous excuses, when the truth would undoubtedly vindicate us? So, here
We're late getting out the October issue because our cherished SELEDA "I am
not a Demagogue!" Chieftain had to miss a crucial editorial meeting. Details are
sketchy, but the unseemly CHm-CHm'ta being that said CEO was ...
'involuntarily detained' at Bole Airport by burly security forces. Something to
do with purportedly trying to sneak onto a red-eye flight to DC after skipping
out on an exorbitant bill incurred at a New Year's bash at a swanky hotel.
We here at SELEDA headquarters stand by our word that we, er, never got the
'many, very many' S.O.S telegrams sent by our fearless leader frantically
demanding a wire transfer from the SELEDA coffers. We would never dream of
letting our supranormal tyrant, we mean, benevolent leader languish in a dank
prison cell for such a minor offense. Hmm. A dark, dank, damp, rat-infested,
haunted jail cell…
Ahem! Excuse us. Where were we?
Ostensibly, this left our CEO to God-awful devices to try to scrounge up the
necessary moolah, and, according to reliable sources, was spotted
singing "Abebaye Hoye" door-to-door in order to defray the cost of
a week's worth of unbridled hedonism in Addis. (That's a heck lot o'
"EnquTaTash, enkuwan dehna meTash" verses, according to the SELEDA
comptroller, who's remaining shush about the 7,120.30 Birr 'Personal Services'
invoice. We're not allowed to ask anymore questions, and, frankly, we really
don't want to know anymore.)
In between bailing out our Chief and trying to spend more time with our still
reluctant family members, well, time flew by. All of a sudden, it was October
already… and, well, we're scared to open the SELEDA mail. It will never happen
again, especially now that any Addis Ababa hotel worth its salt has effectively
banned anyone invoking the SELEDA name to mooch off free drinks and 'personal
But onto qum neger. So, what's new at SELEDA?
While we admit that the SELEDA wheels have been slow to turn this month, we
are in the throes of ye-dess dess as welcome two new editors to
the fold--a couple of no-nonsense,
"we-are-purging-this-'zine-of-its-werobelanet" type editors-- who
we hope will bring back that lovin' feeling to the SELEDA gentry. We are
growing, here at SELEDA, and are inching ever so slowly towards realizing the
Greater SELEDA Empire dream.
Well, what's not new is that we have no progress to report on (at least in
our minds) the highly anticipated new SELEDA forum we gingerly mentioned last
month. The huddling-in-the-corner-and-self-important-sotto
voce-discussions on this issue continue at editorial meetings as we try to
flesh out the concept. Until we come up with something more concrete, however,
we'd be happy to share with you home remedies for knife wounds inflicted by
discontented fellow editors. (That is, right after we finish filling out the
necessary police forms and testifying in small claims court.) We thank all of
you who inquired about the Mother of all Forums, and while we are at it, will
thank you for not holding us to promises of a follow up next month.
Since we had some down time while waiting for our boss to storm back into the
SELEDA trenches all bitter and neCH-na-CHa, we were able to mull
over some new ideas, which had miraculously began to pulsate into our anemic
minds. New this month will be the metamorphosis of the current be- jimla
Life Diaries to the CHiriCHaro Life Diaries…a convoluted
way of saying that LDs will be posted up in once-a-week increments to give it an
intriguing twist. Hey, who are we kidding--- we are control freaks and we want
you to keep coming back to the SELEDA pages. Ufoye! So, keep
coming back to see where our diarists take you.
In "Opinionated Editors" we indelicately inaugurate an occasional feature
where SELEDA editors will try to… well, we don't know… ramble? pontificate? …on
various subjects. This feature, of course, being the result of the
woz -and sometimes lab ader editors winning a class
action suit against upper management, whom they have accused of being
"ye-naTeTu literary tyrants possessing adhari-ish
editorial policies." Vive a-la ekulinet!
On a more positive note, SELEDA number crunchers giddily report that our
readership is growing by leaps and bounds. Last month alone we had close to
5,000 hits, which leads us to think that there might be entirely too many of you
out there with too much time on your hands. We are, of course, delighted. And as
the odious jerba medeleq-ing has us all gobaTa, we
will take into consideration that a good percentage of that number must be the
same three 'Y2K generation' sharpies, who click the counter forward every time
they bounce back to SELEDA from Dictionary.com. Still, not bad for an idea
conceptualized during incoherent times and chaotic thought processes. (Not that
we will try to convince you that these days are any different.)
We would like to thank all of our October contributors who stifled their
'ye manachichu qebrraroch' instincts to work diligently against
impossible deadlines set by very qebrraroch editors. We thank you
for rallying around us at the last minute. It gives us hope that there are real
people who care about SELEDA besides those of us who are sticking around only
until the SELEDA Beanie Babies concept takes off, and then it's Langano, here we
On a serious note, a disturbing phenomenon is seeping into the SELEDA
medrek, where people are actually volunteering to write for
SELEDA without us resorting to the three S's: Seeking, Selamta nesto
menetrek, and Seif yezo masferrarat. While we are, we
think, happy about this progress, (a sure sign we have struck a cord somewhere)
we can't help but get teary-eyed at the thought of having to retire our trusted
seif. But that's all deranged qibTet. We welcome
writers with open arms. Now, that is progress… pay no attention to all
those restraining orders against us.
We promise not to be tardy in November, and hope you enjoy the October issue.
As always, we love hearing from you. Drop us a line at email@example.com.
-The Humble Editors-